In 2009, I became severely debilitated with Lyme disease. My WBC was alarmingly low; I was anemic and iron deficient; I couldn’t remember basic things, like how to get my kids ready for school (I had to use a 15-minute checklist: 7 am get dressed; 7:15 breakfast, etc.) until we finally hired someone to help me. I could barely use my right hand, I was constantly in and out of the hospital, and I was in constant excruciating pain. Eventually, speaking in complete sentences became difficult, and my husband said it was like I had dementia.
My local doctors couldn’t figure out what was causing all my symptoms, and I ended up seeing a Hematologist/Oncologist- even he said he had “never seen test results” like mine before. Based on my bloodwork, they thought I might have Lymphoma or Leukemia, and I endured a bone marrow biopsy, weekly blood tests, and IV iron infusions for about six months. Eventually, they branched out and tried a spinal tap, multiple MRIs, EMGs, and a few CT scans- you name it, I probably did it.
None of the tests explained all my symptoms, and nothing they did or prescribed helped me to get better. My Lyme tests only showed I was positive for four out of the five bands they used for diagnosis back then. They eventually suspected I was developing Lupus, but since I wasn't positive "yet," I should go home and wait until I got worse. My husband and I had two young children; we were desperate, and we were terrified. We eventually began talking about the possibility of placing me in a long-term care facility if I continued to deteriorate.
Thankfully, my husband heard about someone who had recovered from a similar “mystery illness,” and we connected with a specialist who diagnosed me with Ehrlichiosis, Bartonella, and Lyme Disease. Once I started medication, my physical symptoms were the first to improve, but my brain took its own sweet time. I was finally back to what I considered “normal” after about two years, but I still have large chunks of time that I can’t remember.
Although my body fully recovered, my spirit was left shattered, and I was living with the constant fear of what if I get bitten by another tick? The fear was almost as challenging to deal with as the physical illness, and anyone who has faced that fear knows what I mean. I felt like I was constantly looking over my shoulder, refusing to make long-term plans because I felt that would somehow tempt fate against me. I knew that medication was not the answer for me, so I began looking into other healing modalities. I heard about an energy healer and made an appointment. I had no idea what energy healing was, and I didn’t care- I was willing to try anything.
The second the healer touched my feet, I felt a burst of what I can only describe as electricity go up my legs, and I remember thinking, “holy cow- that’s awesome!” When she got to my hands, they started tingling and buzzing, and I was honestly terrified it was another Lyme disease symptom. My healer explained that I was fine; it meant I was also a healer. I immediately dismissed that idea but returned to the healer whenever she was in town because I felt the fear lessening after every visit. I was so grateful that I started asking my healer more questions about energy healing and learned how to do the work so I could help others.
Early in my practice, I started noticing the similarities between the energy patterns of people dealing with long-term illness, either currently or in the past. Most of them carried a pattern of fear in their shoulders that usually extended down to their lungs. It was almost as if they were stuck holding their breath. The specific timing and illness didn't really matter- the pattern was similar for COVID-19, cancer, Lyme, etc. I believe the "not knowing" helped create this pattern. In my work, the lungs represent freedom and are shaped like wings!
My personal experience definitely helps me in my work with others. I understand the fear, the hiding, and the feeling that you are a burden. I also understand that talking about the illness can be exhausting, and I always tell my clients they can share as much or as little as they want. Sometimes, people want to come in, lie down, and forget about everything. Others want to talk about everything and then have me get to work, while some prefer to talk after the session. Unlike traditional modalities, I don't believe in a one-size-fits-all mentality. Instead, I feel it's better to let things unfold at my clients' pace. That was a choice I wasn't offered while I was sick, and I know how valuable it would have been for me during that time.
I'm happy to share my knowledge and resources regarding Lyme disease recovery with anyone interested. A great place to start is ILADS.org, which has a searchable database for all things Lyme.